Amelia stands out from the line
Those new to writing will often fall in love with words and become over-enthusiastic in their application. However, overly verbose writing negates the impact. Use adjectives but go easy, less is more.
An example of an adjective/adverb heavy sentence:
‘A dark grey, crinkled brow of solemn cloud crept sluggishly over the majestic hills that were patchily bruised with a blackish purple moss and randomly spiked with prickly yellow furze.’
There is too much going on in this sentence, far too much colour. Each individual image is in competition for the reader’s attention. The result is a confusing clash. Think about what is necessary here. Everyone knows furze is yellow and prickly. Do you need to inform the reader of these facts? “Majestic” doesn’t really do anything here – except communicate that the hill is big, which one would assume. Edit that sentence down.
‘A cloud slugged over the hills,’ has far more impact.
A note on adverbs:
Adverbs have a bad reputation in the literary world. Many writers avoid them completely (there’s one right there). I would suggest you use them with caution and very, very sparingly (see, another one) and never, ever with speech attribution (“she said nervously”). Adverbs like “suddenly” or “immediately” are thought of as cliché traffic lights. If something happens unexpectedly in a story, you don’t need to “flag it” to make the reader aware that this was a “sudden” action – it should be obvious. “A bomb exploded” is more striking than “Suddenly, a bomb exploded”.
Over reliance on adjectives and adverbs is a typical, and some would say necessary, phase for those beginning their writing journey. So, don’t worry if you recognize your own writing here. As “mistakes” go, the over use of adjectives and adverbs is a useful one, as it serves to build your vocabulary. All good writers should have this phase. Just keep calm, carry on, edit down the adjectives and remove the adverbs – and you’re on your way.
suehealy 
April 3rd, 2012 at 10:30
Great post Sue…as I’m reading it I’m going, oh dear, yep, yep, that me lol *blush*
Xx
April 3rd, 2012 at 11:22
Oh yes, I’ve caught myself looking at sentences and thinking, “I don’t need to tell my readers the mountain is huge. It’s a mountain. Of course it’s huge!” Once you start noticing things like that, they’re much easier to spot and destroy. Excellent post.
April 3rd, 2012 at 11:36
Uh oh! That’s me. Events in my writing frequently happen ‘suddenly’ and ‘all at once’. Red pencil time!
April 3rd, 2012 at 12:54
Amen! Chagrined and blushing.
April 3rd, 2012 at 13:43
I can dig it!
April 3rd, 2012 at 14:39
Your example, “A dark grey…” makes my hair hurt. It is odd now to remember all the flowery examples our English teachers suggested were WRONG. Good post!
April 4th, 2012 at 01:43
I will admit there are times when I’m a little heavy handed with the descriptors. I’m getting better. I think. I hope. We’ll see, I guess. I really enjoyed your post.
April 6th, 2012 at 14:28
Thanks for the reminder, Sue. I’ll slay the adverbs more often now.
April 10th, 2012 at 01:54
Great tips reminds me of middle school when we were learning adjectives and adverbs. Thanks!
April 20th, 2012 at 05:57
By the way, I updated my latest post, here is the new link: http://eof737.wordpress.com/2012/04/18/memories-of-moments-in-bliss/ TY! 🙂
May 12th, 2012 at 05:06
Now this is really where I have to knuckle down – I just love to paint pictures, layering the words on like a painter with his oils. Sometimes I can’t tell whether they’re adjectives or adverbs, sometimes I I like to make them into nouns or verbs. Oh dear. Ma always said I use too many words … Thanks for the lesson;)
April 26th, 2017 at 02:12
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